Should Married People be Involved in ASAM?
#1
Should married people be involved in Single Adult Ministries? By all means, YES! Single Adult Ministries is just that, a ministry and our focus is on ministry and helping singles establish and work on their relationship with Jesus. This is our #1 priority. Many other denominations have marrieds helping and leading the ministry. These individuals have caught a vision of the very important ministry taking place at our events.

There are some singles and married people who do not understand what this ministry is and what it is trying to do. It is a place where single people are accepted and loved just as they are. It is a place where fellowship takes place and Christian friendships are made. It is a place where personal growth takes place. It is a place to discuss issues of importance to the single adult. It is not a place where disturbed adults prey on other adults. It is not a place to find a spouse although you might. It is a place where we meet the ultimate single, Jesus.

So, yes, we need marrieds involved in the ministry, leading and helping. We value you and your input and insights. Please do not stop posting here. You are most welcome to do so!
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#2
I agree, and it has been heartening to see that marrieds in my church are willing to help with singles ministry.

I wonder if the fear by some singles leaders is that sometimes those in transition - in other words, separated - who want to be involved in singles activities, can get emotionally involved with someone else when the other person doesn't know they are really not available. It's a tricky thing, trying to serve all those with needs. That transitional time, I understand, is a very tough one. You hate to say, "No, you can't come." And you hate to be an instrument in causing heartbreak if you let them come and they are not upfront with everyone about their status.

It would be so great if everyone could understand that involvement in ASAM is not meant to be an "I'm available, come get me" kind of announcement. If we could get that message across to everyone, I think a lot more would like to be involved. This is one way that having married couples help with the ministry helps clear the air about the purpose of the ministry.
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#3
We have struggled at getting the message of what our ministry is about across to our churches for years. Our ASAM Committee has even had the church service in quite a number of churches and yet they still don't get it. I had a pastor try to argue with me at our recent camp pitch saying it was a place to find a spouse. We had two other pastors send either a family member or a church member to our camp meeting singles events for them to find a spouse. Yes a single person might find someone there but, there a people who find a mate in a church service. Does that mean that that church's service earns the reputation of being a place to hunt for a spouse? Of course not! So if a person finds a spouse at some of our events does that mean that our events are a place to hunt for a spouse? Apparently some people think so. That is soooo sad! And what gets me is that these people have never even ever attended any of our events or activities.
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#4
So....what can be done to change the image of this ministry being a place where a single person can some and find a mate? How can we get the message across to our churches?

Today our society is so focused on finding a soul mate or finding a sex partner. We see it in the movies, on TV and in advertising. Will we ever be able to change it? How can ASAM adapt or bring about change to the perception of our church members? Is it possible?
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#5
We had a married man come and offer to be on our ASAM Committee fairly recently. He used to be single and has been married for the past 2 years. We accepted him on our Committee and just recently he phoned before our meeting and I suggested that he bring his wife for our supper just before our meeting. He brought her and she then offered to be on our Committee too. So, we now have a married couple on our Committee. We are very blessed because they both add a lot to our Committee. Gerald plays the guitar and sings and is going to lead out in our music next Sabbath at our Sabbath Day in the Park. Yes, we are truly blessed to have them on our Committee and helping out with our events and the single adults at our events also appreciate having them. Now, if they hadn't both been single before things might be different but, they do understand what it's like to be single. God is blessing!
Make it Happen! :-)
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#6
We have a married man who just offered to help with our ASAM Program at our upcoming Camp Meeting? Should we accept his offer? Definitely! Our Committee will be meeting on Tuesday evening to plan our whole program.....time is rushing by and we need to get moving fast. I hope this married man will be able to help us at our camp meeting. He will be good.
Make it Happen! :-)
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#7
Our Conference is now looking for someone to replace me as the director of our ASAM. It is hard to find someone and when talking to our president the other day he asked whether I thought it was okay to get a married person to lead it. I really do think it is okay and so we'll be looking...........
Make it Happen! :-)
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#8
We now have a married person interested but, don't know if this will work out or not..........have to wait and see.
Make it Happen! :-)
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